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Sat, Aug. 14th, 2004, 03:47 pm
ok so after that horrible self-pitying, self-loathing post i just did, i figured i should remind myself that this has been the best summer of my life. no questions asked. and now i shall smile and be on my happy little way. :)
Sat, Aug. 14th, 2004, 03:34 pm
im CrAvInG salt. this sux cuz now i sit here and eat salty foods, which are without a doubt the worst for you. like spaghetti-o's. *mental note*: get rid of all spaghetti-o's in house.
today sux, probably because i havent gotten out of the house to go for a run or anything so i feel like crap. but i also am having problems. my biggest one goes like this:
ok so theres a new girl on the tennis team named chloe. and apparently hewe told emily that the three of us juniors should take her out to do something...get to kno us a little and feel a little less left out. so i was like 'hey maybe madelines...' and meant only to ask chloe if she was invited (which she wasnt) but my mouth ran off before my mind could catch up...so then i had to call madeline. but madeline wasnt there, so i figured 'ok, i should be able to catch her before her party'. WRONG. i have called like every day for the past week and shes NEVER there. ahhh. so today i tried to call chloe but SHES not there, and i feel horrible...now i remember why i hate people. and to top it all off, i told amrita i couldnt go to her birthday party because i thought i was taking chloe to madelines. if i were an ostrich i would bury my head in the sand and die. i feel horrible. especially since i really wanted to go to amrita's.
and because i just lightened my hair and its kind of a strange slightly orange shade.
and because i have gained 2.5 pounds in the week since ive been back. guess im not swimming at madeline's tonight.
and because i miss everyone, and because i feel ugly.
Fri, Jul. 23rd, 2004, 11:11 pm
1. Grab the nearest book to you, turn to page 18, line 7. Read what it says: 'mossy stuff on the underside of the sjingles, and though... '
2. Stretch out your left hand as far as you can. What do you touch first?: the door of the computer cabinet
3. What was the last thing you watched on tv?: the calling music video
4. Without looking, guess what time it is: 10:43 pm
5. Look at the clock. What time is the actual time?: 10:48 pm
6. With the exception of the computer, what do you hear?: maybe some noises from my brothers room...and this stupid song thats stuck in my head!
7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?: maybe 35 minutes ago, coming home from babysitting
8. Before you did this survey, what were you looking at?: my friends page
9. What are you wearing?: jean spants and a 'st. louis black sox' t-shirt that actually belongs to my brother
10. Did you dream last night?: i always dream!
11. When did you last laugh?: really laugh? this morning when bob and rob were playing dirty with the microphone during filming. haha you'd never guess they've been through college
12. What are on the walls in the room you are in?: 10 plates, 3 bowles, and a vase in the quimper pattern my mom collects...windows...o crap 3 more little plates...a phone, old school style with a chord and a mr. yuk sticker on it thats been colored in so you cant really see his face...a needlepoint my mom did...a picture of my dad's favorite diner...and a bread basket.
13. See anything weird lately?: its so normal to see weird things that i dont even think about them anymore!
14. What do you think of this quiz?: interesting
15. What was the last film you saw?: 'confessions of a teenage drama queen' with the girl i was babysitting. before that it was 'love, actually' very cute, very british, and very much making fun of americans!
16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?: two vacation houses: one in lindau and one in rockport. and then id buy a full body massage for my mom because she needs to de-stressify herself majorly lol. shes always so busy!
17. Tell me something about you that I don't know: i have this scary fear that if i dyed my hair a little red and got a bad fake tan id look a lot like lindsay lohan.
18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?: about the world? probably try to help all of our countries get along...make america not so hated (hopefully)...
19. Do you like to dance?: sometimes. i do it unconsciously, so i guess i do
20. George W. Bush: hahaha dubya. o god. finally a president that represents the masses: uninformed, unintelligent, and ALWAYS right.
21. Imagine your first child is a girl.: yeah...um whats the question. im imagaining it. shed be the most beautiful baby in the world, of corse, and i have no earthly idea what id name her...though i think i like the middle name mae. except it kind of sounds hillbily-ish...but it was my great-aunt's name.
22. Imagine your first child is a boy.: yes. ok. once again, most beautiful baby in the world...probably would be named john because thats a family name, or aaron. i think that these names really would have to depend on the baby's father, though. i want to pick the names together
23. Would you ever consider living abroad?: omg i think about it every day. looking at college, i only pick ones that have a good study abroad program...and i think after college id love to live somewhere in europe for a couple of years. you know, just have fun for a while, while i still can. living abroad is a BIG part of my plans for the future.
Tue, Jul. 13th, 2004, 09:52 am
'fault lines should be worn with pride'
Sun, Jul. 11th, 2004, 04:39 pm
im back! and god do i wish i werent! though i am glad to see my family again, most of my friends are gone...or they live in germany. omg we had so much fun though. especailly me. i got surprisingly close to garland and meredith. and andy and i got soo close. it got serious...especailly after that day sailing.
there is so much to tell about i have no idea where to start! i have most of it recounted in one of my *4* journals (oy vey!) but posting here is still nice. ok so lets begin.
lindau is beautiful. incredibly beautiful...the definition of beauty! i love that people walk everywhere, and at every turn there are roses or flowers in a window box (hehe flowers make me so happy)! helena's apartment was off the island but not very far away from the bridge, so it took maybe 15 or 20 minutes to get to andy's house which was right by the harbor.
i love the lifestyle. it makes so much more sense than our 'american way' where we drive everywhere and then complain about being fat, allow people to own guns at the age of 16, or go to war at the age of 18 but you cant drink until the age of 21. unfortunately, i understand the idea behind the laws: prevention of drunk drivers. but seriously. strengthen the punishment against drinking and driving!!! im not exactly saying lower the drinking age to 16, but i think it makes a lot of sense the way they have it.
their school days make a lot more sense as well. classes from 8am-1pm with one 20? minute break midmorning. then you walk home to lunch and if its monday you go back at 3 or something for language and sport. more time for living in between. makes much more sense.
our adventures included climbing the alps (yay for me and meredith...frouen power!!), matt walking through a glass door, sheeshas (o my), sailing, scotch and new orleans (bars), wet t-shirt contest (once again yay for me and meredith), a fortress, a cool castle, a party where there was a room completely filled with bubbles (shaum party), naked saunas (OH my), really long slides, the german abitur ball (like prom, yay!), and lots of andy time for me.
god i miss him.
ok enuf babbling for now. i need to take a shower because WHOOHOO i just hiked 4.5 miles in this heat, and now im very sweaty and nasty.
Sun, Jul. 4th, 2004, 11:48 pm
Tue, Jun. 1st, 2004, 07:08 pm
nose: 2wnhedu8mbhloo0nhjdc e3
tongue: wundumblonde <-- no joke that was with my tongue!!
chin: swhujy nbcdjuhm n b,loin dfer <-- good lord!
eyes closed and one finger: eunf8kbklonfr
back of my hand: nfumblondfe
palm: wuindum b nl;,onm dfer
wrist: wmnm df,m b n;lm n
man am i glad i have hands!! and eyes...
Sun, May. 30th, 2004, 09:43 am
Mon, May. 24th, 2004, 10:44 pm
Mon, May. 24th, 2004, 10:37 pm
i want to SCREAM.
she doesnt even have to talk to me to make me angry
i wore a new shirt today and yes, i'll admit it, i looked pretty preppy. i mean , tight pink shirt with a bow, pleated skirt. yeah...really preppy in fact. but i felt pretty and like myself, so everything was great. but i know that everytime i walked by she looked at me in disdain and i could just see the thoughts forming: *o great, we've lost another one*.
and it makes me so cold to think of her being so much of this person she's not...and telling lies to a certain person. i get so jealous. the minute they start talking agian shes all he can talk about. shes on his profile, on his away messages....its never like that when he and i start talking again.
oh well. i'll get over it
just needed to vent.
why do some people just feel the need to be everything but themselves?
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